The Plot thickens...

Get it. The Plot of land... fills out.

Facts are facts... I need to lose the "Oh i have been emotionally diminished by unfair forces beyond my control and now i Just Don't Care anymore" Chump Robertson tripe and focus on the positive again. What do you have? And how can you make it better? I have some fucking carrots to get across the finish line... pluck them big ass broccoli leaves that are shading them. Get those damn tomatoes staked up and prune prune prune the blight away.

Other good news is that the beans are flowering and kicking into to another round of production. I'll give myself credit for savage watering that has sent the signals of bounty conditions to the plant's DNA to yes, kick into high gear after that period of inadequate care while i was away. You can always tell a human but you can't tell them anything.

A few days ago i was down on the garden... just not a good year... it was because i had it in my head how things were going to go down and when things went sideways i went over the handle bars and had a swearing fit... good times for sure.

We have Beans, Broccoli and a good tomato crop... there is some wild chard and some beets that look like they should be in a textbook with the heading "Examples of severe drought" And a paragraph about planting seeds at the wrong time... which perhaps might even make a finer point about if you are to plant at the wrong time then make sure you have full surveillance so that you can water regularly and even shade from scalding sun during extreme periods. Instead I plant and go on holiday leaving a human in charge... actually i left 4 of them in charge. A human needs to be inspired to do what needs to be done and i believe in most cases the word "inspired" has been modified to some consumer or pop culture timbit so that the idea of growing food properly is this weird fantasy that is like super cool but you don't really have the time to do it... and then you just shake your head and go into a dream sequence where you imagine the level of co-ordination required if we actually had to do that. i always go back to the Hive... the Bee hive... a model of efficiency... tasks are expected and any stepping out of line means automatic execution. We don't have time to hear you explain why you think you might be right... cause hell if you did it would be January and the hive would be out of honey and the colony would be freezing their ass off probably listening to the jackass bee who in August held up the hive with his fucking whiny ass tale about why he couldn't do 45 pollen runs in a day as expected in the Bee contract union handbook, and now when we are all dying of starvation we have to hear him complaining about his relationship with the Queen bee.

That would be silly... because of course the Queen Bee would be an honest leader and not sitting on a million tons of honey while the workers starved...

OK.

So as i was saying... you have too look at your garden, recognize what you have and bring it home.

Cultivate- to promote or improve the growth of (a plant, crop, etc.) by labor and attention.

Sometimes people think of cultivation as just working the soil... and it does mean that too. But seriously, now is the time for hard decisions... you have to decide what needs to be cut back so that room for others to thrive can be created. Is that Zucchini getting white mould and is it going to produce anymore? Perhaps it just needs to go as it is now a source of disease and is shading other crops. One has to start making calls... what has the best chance right now, and how do i make it's chances better.

Reminder... Build a serious shelter for those tomatoes. it's time to man up a make shift greenhouse... guide what you have home.

Of course I caught the old non English speaking Vietnamese lady ( a friend of the lady that has the plot next to mine) watering my Tomatoes at dusk again... I was trying to tell her to back the fuck off but from her actions i believe she understood that i was telling her to water the tomatoes more to yes, splash the blight around... i think i might have gotten through after a while, but i took a soaked foot in doing it. I need to calm down, I will go to Yoga and clear my mind. Have you ever heard of restorative Yoga? i hadn't either... I'm a kind of sun salutations guy, but in restorative Yoga you just go into gentle rest poses and try to relax... definitely not Man Yoga... and even worse if you happened to be stiff as a board due to anger related issues, alcoholism and general neglect then doing a slight twist leaning on a pillow isn't as relaxing as the sales pitch might make it seem... in fact i could only gulp small breaths while the rest of the class took long breaths counting to five on the inhale and five on the exhale... i could feet the tendon attached to the base of my skull going into spasm but i tried to man it up and breath through it... apparently you are suppose to relax and feel cleansing thoughts. I had an idea... i dig up that old coot's garden, grab the cement out of my garage and turn her garden into a concrete slab perhaps writing the words "water this you simple son of a ..."

I wouldn't do that of course... she means well. The Kook that lives in the apartment behind is another story and a booby trap is coming her way... she leaves a tray of rotting food by my garden every day. I think she might be feeding an imaginary monster as well as some very real rodents.

Apparently you can plant lettuce, spinach, radish's and various greens in September in the Pacific Northwest... I should plant some Radishes this week in the small space i have left... in fact since i have been back i seem to have cultivated the garden back to being a producing machine... need to leave room for garlic of course.

Keep your eye on the whole picture, see the garden thought the plants, and the plants through the garden. You are always at a fork in the road and whichever way you go do it completely, no regrets, never retreat, never apologize. Nature doesn't have emotions... the one who can take advantage of the conditions does the best.

Opps sorry starting to talk in terms of evolution... so to be a fair blog i guess we should present a creationist view of gardening... You don't need to plant anything, God will do it for you, in the meantime you should go to your toilet and put your head in the nice cool water in the bowl and give it a flush. Once you have given yourself a baptism swirly god will know to rain vegetables on you and all your problems will be solved so long as you always vote within you religious doctrine sticking to asinine beliefs and your bubble will be protected.

Various thoughts...

I went to the garden the other day and a couple of aggressive hammerheads ( 2 separate folk) watered my garden for me at dusk... they soaked the shit out of the green leaf matter of my Tomatoes. I appreciate the effort in thinking of helping me by watering my garden, but i also find it frusterating that people always forget the golden rule when watering tomatos in a blight festering climate. You have to keep the damn leaves dry especially at night or the blight will be nurtutred. Clearly this is where a greenhouse comes in in spades (keeps rain off plants), but in absence of a greenhouse don't water your tomatoes after 4PM or if you do soak the ground only.
Seems like a simple thing to remember but remember when you are dealing with humans then you will have problems... I just happen to hate making the same mistake over and over again.

Ok- speaking of mistakes i hauled in the second lot of garlic tonight and I'll be a fatso in a fasting commune if i didn't leave it in the ground too long... Why didn't i pull it all weeks ago when i did the garlic harvest? Because i wanted to learn that if you leave it too late it starts to rot and regenerate in the ground. If i do that next year kill me. Mind you it was the great Bold Point Farm garlic stock and i think i want to replant all of it to get a real good haul next year, so i think it should still be good to replant. I was warned by a fine farming neighbour that it was garlic harvesting time, and i left it too late.. perhaps i have poor drainage in the area, could be one thing, because it was in September that the Garlic was harvested in Bold Point... although it would be reasonable to assume that the Quadra Island season is a few weeks behind the Vancouver season.

Apparently the report is for a cold fall, but seeing that the report was for a hot summer, i like my chances... Chances for fall harvest that is. One thing that turned out to be gangbusters was my Hops plantation... put my hops by a 4 year old compost and let it climb to full sun all day and got one hell of a harvest... the amazing thing here is this is the plant i dug out of a back alley last year and i went back to visit the mother plant and it is way behind. Conditions are really everything. Like berries some are early and others late, depending on the conditions. Clearly a plant with ample nutrients and ample sunlight can do what it needs to do in a shorter period of time... of course reproduction is the name of the game in life... only in humans is the personal "life" more important... and hey it's pretty good... I'm digging it.



I'm making beer with my life and swilling it and then typing shit on a keyboard and perhaps somebody might read it and learn something, or think something that they might otherwise not have. It's hard to say, and in the end it's all just memories.

China Creek park south needs a new caretaker... no question

OK lets get this bad boy over with... i think we can let the photographs tell the story:

So how does one accidentally trim a pea plant at waist height? Can one be so incompetent? Or is the word malicious? Seeing that i have placed rocks around the base of the fence and just the day before trimmed the grass around the edge so the city workers wouldn't have to. (photo from early in the spring) one might think that what happened is unthinkable?
Clearly one needs to maul all the peas as a matter of principle, because of course you can't have peas on a fence in the community garden... that's fucking blasphemous Fuck that guy and his peas... rules say what goes on in the garden stays in the garden... clearly we are too busy doing a real good job keeping the park beautiful.

One of our other instructions is that if you see a piece of garbage like a VHS tape then hit it with the riding mower and spread the shit all over the place and then just fuck off and leave it.

Also when you put thousands of dollars of new trees into a park the best thing you can do is ring the bark off every one of them a few weeks after they are planted right before a heat wave.
lets face it, as a city worker your life sucks and you need to let people know that your life sucks and you can do that by doing the shittiest job possible so that the people of the neighbourhood go to their park and just shake their fucking heads at what an incredible disgrace this thing is. It's not lost on us, your indifference is not lost on me... BTW i put myself through University in part by doing landscaping for a private company.. one of the things we did when we finished a job was to look back and see it and if anything looked wrong we fixed it. Clearly the crew that takes care of china creek south park couldn't care less about the work they do.


As for gardening wisdom, I have this:

Shit hole year for tomatoes... i believe i swore by greenhouses and this cold rainy year brought on the blight in the biggest way. You have to cut that blight away...better to have a blight less twig than a bushy blight ridden plant.

Just harvested a king hell crop of garlic that i planted last fall... cut the tops so they don't seed and put the energy into bulbs.

Beets good, broccoli good, beans good... peas were great until murdered by self serving goateed beer drinking fools with their whole life in front of them like a thundercloud.

Either i planted too much celery or i didn't make enough soups... as a busy father of 3 young kids I'll cut myself some slack. i am now the poet laureate of china creek south park and i spent the day picking up garbage in the park so the idiot lawn cutting crew doesn't shred it putting more plastic Slurpee cups into the fold.

Why do we have lawns and disposable plastic cups?

seriously

Points to ponder

Gardening is an exercise of observation and response where preparation and patience yield results. Like the good student who did their work all semester and then cruises into the exam with some touch up studying and a vibe of total confidence... meanwhile the lazy joking slack ass has to wolf down a few bowls of cereal and jog to the emergency room whiffing exhaust so he (or she) can make a grand entrance bursting in and vomiting everywhere just to get out of writing the exam he (or she) is not prepared to write. It's just life, or as a hockey analysts might say "it's the game within the game"... meaning when your garden is under control and growing in the right direction it just becomes a matter of gentle and regular maintenance.

Things to think about: year to year things are different... For example, last year my spinach crop was just out of this world. In fact i made pizza the other week and threw on some of the spinach from last years garden that i had washed and frozen. This year it's good for a couple little snacks and then we say aloha sucker... old seeds or just not ideal weather at the ideal time? Probably a combination of both when you get down to the raw science of the matter, the real point being is that crops go boom or bust from year to year. That's why of course it's good to diversify your vegetable garden... Holy sheep shit, i sound like a bank selling portfolio advise... I will punch myself in the face after another glass of man Robertson's Hammer time wine. Actually come to think of it what I'm saying is good advise... perhaps i should go punch a banker in the face.. or somebody who is responsible for making commercials for banks in the face. For sure i should go punch the person who makes those "banking profile survey folders" in the face.

The derailments are just horrible around here, fortunately I'm incorrigible so lets move on to our next point... and this time no insane diversions.

Me- i dug a trench behind my garden plot and filled it with rocks so that grass won't grow close to the fence so the retarded city workers in the park might be less likely to kill my pea plants... it should be noted that nothing is guaranteed when it comes to their level of incompetence.




A lot of my rocks came from woMAN gardener as she was the first to go to town on that particular plot. Most of my rocks (that i pulled out of my plot) went under the community garden shed before it was built. woMAN gardener happened to listen to MAN gardener as MAN gardener was frothing off in a rage about the cruel and incompetent manner of the city parks crew and had one king hell idea. She planted her peas in from the fence and is going to run strings from the top of the fence downward to protect them from weed eating stupidity. Well done! Here i am building a trench to defend my territory and she uses the fence as a natural barrier and places the plants away from it. Although i should note she is losing precious territory... her logic is perfect and her plan will work for sure... it's just the you are giving up territory... and that's unacceptable in a war. Lets make no mistake... we are at war with the city parks crew... this is a crew that mowed down about 5% of the grass the other week and of that 5% it included all the blueberry and raspberry bushes that were donated to the garden under the mason bee program... and the crew left the rest of the 95% of the park "UN mowed". They are malicious ass holes and giving up territory is unacceptable now that i think of it... as a matter of fact i have a new idea. Check this: Man Robertson's moat and trout pond... fucking brilliant! Circle the garden with a trout pond so the city landscaping crew can't destroy our stuff on purpose easily, and have a healthy supply of good eating trout. My idea is good there is no doubt about that... it's just a matter of getting an unauthorized excavation crew in there to set it up. I'm sure the parks crew workers would have no problem with the shear math of the Man Robertson trout pond moat= less grass to cut= less work. Which leaves our only real problems at infant/small child drownings and homeless trout poachers as far as i can see. I guess we will need another fence around the trout moat.

There once was a river there, called China creek, but they figured that the best idea going was to turn it into a garbage dump, and then it became full so they threw some rocks and dirt on top and called it a park. So the key question is... how deep does the trout moat need to be to ensure trout survival but yet ward against trout escaping through the underground stream? Perhaps a mesh barrier lining the Man Robertson trout pond. I have to say i think the garden will have more authority with a drawbridge in front of it! Yes yes yes.. these are all good ideas.

overdue

If i only had taken the photos like i meant to to help explain the kind of work a Man needs to do to a man garden in the off season to get ready for the gardening season i could really make some strong points. It didn't happen... but on the bright side for the past 2 weeks as Vancouver has been under Monsoon alert and all the other chuckle heads have been whining about the weather like simpleton humans often do I have been skipping around thinking about my tender Spinach, lettuce, pea, broccoli, potato, garlic and celery plants that are just loving the moisture. i actually had a bit of garden celery in a chicken noodle soup i made today.

As any fine erratic individual would do, i have made a few mistakes already, but nothing that can't be overcome with some hard focus weeding and delicate manure placement. as usual i just happened to be so ahead of the curve i planted some of my garden before the manure showed up... it's all good... lets just say my garden is not totally level at this point in time... i have a lettuce patch and a spinach area that will have to give way to a bean crop in a month or so and at that time i will also harvest the naturally occurring potatoes and do a soil refresh. i have always found life works well when done in stages.

As a parent in the park with 3 children i find the patented technique termed "Robertson region gardening" is good for short bursts and long term success. That said i think my spinach seeds are a bit old as the germination percentage was not where i like it to be... remember to use good seeds and know that i just punched myself in the face for good measure. Man gardeners can't be making rookie mistakes like that... it's just totally unacceptable. garden is growing life and it's success is through managing time... the time of the growing season... if you waste that time on poor seeds you then become what we call "an hammerhead".

Speaking of hammerheads... you see there are some folks in the garden who's plots have basically become "weed infested lawns" and the plan that it looks like they are rolling with is to just throw manure on the grass and dandelions and other weeds, as if to cover them up so that the will not have to look at their annoyingness. The point being that the grass and weeds will love that... it will help them grow stronger and more vigorous... anybody following me?

I'm punching myself in the face because my spinach plants are 70% on the seeds and other people are throwing manure onto grass and calling it a garden.

But there is one... a new one... a woman... who prepared her soil this year and dug out a rock the size of a medium sized dog (no small feat)... she dug 3 feet down and showed up with a 1 ton landscaping truck and a mountain of prime soil. She was sifting rocks and removing every trace of weed root from her soil... This woman will give me a run for the money. You can see when she is on task the task gets bigger the more she explores it, rather than the average human sissy response of finding out the job is bigger than you thought it was even though you weren't thinking... so you just bail on it.

Well she is behind me this year because of this preparation (that i did a few years ago) and i threw weedkiller in her plot just to make sure... can't have some upstart rookie trying to show me up in her first year. OK that was a joke... i would never throw weedkiller in anybodies vegetable garden... that would be plain pathological and wrong on every level imaginable. Weedkiller is for stupid people who think that having a green manicured lawn is a symbol of success and that the buck stops there and are either unaware or just don't care that the water cycle... known as the hydrologic cycle will carry that weedkiller through all components of our living environment... fucking various essential lifeforms as they go. I know i Know... I'm an ass hole... the economy is the only important thing and if people are out there buying weedkiller than they are out there stimulating the economy... yadda yadda yadda.

I think i have derailed this blog for now.

No we need to leave on goodwill... Our new woMan gardener had a massive supply of good rocks and i happened to remember that the city crew that look after the park are as useless as thistle underwear so i built a trench around the backside of my garden ( eliminate weeds from attacking garden, and eliminate the temptation for bonehead city crew workers to kill all my pea plants with a weed eater in a sloppy effort to get those weeds). So i dug the trench and eliminated all the weed roots and then filled in the trench with all the rocks from the woMan garden. A perfect working example of Symbiosis... Symbiosis is a biological term to describe the mutualistic relationship between organisms. In our case we have woMan who did a ton of work and created a pile of rocks she needed to get rid of... and we have Man who did a pile of work and needed some rocks as "fill"... In the end everything is done and everybody is happy... an no politician was involved.

Hot Damn

And this, some shocking news about man-gardener:

http://www.genderanalyzer.com/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fsrmgb.blogspot.com%2F

Taken from an email that flew through the gardening community... ha ha ha funny as fucking shit right. It's understandable how some corn fed gender analysing website could get things so wrong like that. Talking about plants probably sets of some bizarre gender alarms created by some short sighted application designer. Men are suppose to drink beer and watch sports, fix the roof, take out the garbage... yada yada yada.

Hey I'm a stay home dad now with 3 daughters essentially doing what some, in certain generations, have called "Woman's work". I just do it with a Man mentality... If my kid falls in the park, i don't rush over and over and freak out with panic on my face projecting that it was a big deal... not that all woman do that, and certainly my wife doesn't, but i have had moments in the park where some loon took it upon themselves to go pick up my kid and freak out because they thought that's what i should be doing. Funny because in time now my kids wipe out and walk it off, where the kids of these "caring" caregivers wipe out and then spent the next five minutes being carried and screaming bloody murder at the top of their lungs with their mouths inches away from the caregivers ear... they suck it up, and i cite inefficiency.

Speaking of efficiency, now is a good time to set your garden efficiency... I live in Vancouver, things are starting to roll, ground is soft and unfrozen. I almost put a post up a few weeks ago trying to dare myself into rocking a full garden spinach coverage... the plan was to nab an early spinach yield and then lay in the other crops in a few months. It's a good thing i never got around to it because we took a good freeze a little while ago... there was even a day of tobogganing. But a nice Man gamble to ponder... bet on sports for money, or bet on the weather for spinach yield. Remember the thrill of betting is to win. Word to the wise... if you can make your life bets on things you can afford to lose then you are walking the right way.

Announcement- Now is your time to totally de-weed your garden... put in your hours of labour now... get the whole root of the weed out, shake the soil from it, and get that weed somewhere where it can't come back to haunt you. If you de-weed that soil now, the whole rest of your gardening year will be done on a higher level. Not only that on that but the day when you go to start planting, that's what you do that day... and you plant right. If you show up to your garden "cold" with the mindset to plant... what you will find is that you will spend too many hours digging and then do a rushed planting at the end of the day because your mindset will be all wrong. A rushed planting when you are tired is one of the more common disasters of your average gardener... it's all wrong and then you live with it for the season. It's kind of like if you go to record an album, then make damn sure your drummer is good... otherwise you end up, as i like to say "pre-defeated". Actually I have never said that before, but it felt pretty good when i thought it... it works.

Other things i have to do- Dig out all of the grass on the far side of the fence so that the useless, pathetic, incompetent, selfish, lazy, cruel and just plain dangerous city park maintenance crew doesn't feel the need to one day, and one day only, come by in mid summer and trim the grass against the community garden with a weed eater and KILL all of my pea plants changing my dynamic from being a proud man with fresh peas for his family every day to a raving lunatic going on about the gross incompetence of the City parks crew. I should probably actually put a "weed eating guard" against the fence... yes i will have to do that for sure... you wouldn't go swimming at night where you knew tiger sharks were feeding with bleeding cuts all over your body, just like you can't allow a beer drinking goateed city worker with his whole life ahead of him like a thundercloud to get near your exposed garden with a gas powered plant killing machine. That's when you have to think like a man... I'm in a Union, I have followed structured work orders... go out there and do this... never mind if you happen to ring the bark off of thousands of dollars of new trees trimming the grass to make a hundred and fifty bucks for a day... hell i bet you don't even know what you did.. you just did it an now you are done and you contributed to the economy and that's all that matters.

Getting dark... In a perfect world i would be the one who takes care of the park, I would be good, have done that work ( i paid my way through University with a landscaping shovel), and i really want the park plants to live and thrive. The world doesn't work that way of course, I would have to bust a Union which i have no interest in doing for many reasons... the best one being the less conflict you have in your life the better you life will be. I think the way to go is understand the problem and then work to put up barriers to thwart the problem from thwarting you. After multiple calls to the city i finally got them to put guards around the bass of the trees so the hammerheads can't strip the bark from the base of the trees. You do know how a tree feeds itself: Xylem and phloem make up the big transportation system of vascular plants, and they are located in the bark of the tree. You kill them it's like cutting the veins of an animal=death... although plants are better at miraculous survival.

And finally this statement: the only thing more intense than a man gardner is a woman garnder... they garden by their "spiritual mood", what they want to see and feel in their garden... colour combinations, and the concept of what should be where because thats the way they "envision it" and not because "that's what the specific soil, sun and climate conitions will allow"... their innate bizarre woman moods are tied directly to their garden producing as they had hoped, or emotionally felt for that matter and not to scientific assay. For the most part i stay the fuck away from women gardens... every once in a while i have to file a blueberry plant or an apple tree near a woman garden and it causes me all kinds of stress. A plant needs what a plant needs, but a woman is different... they have ideas.

A little Christmas gardening

One of the reasons I moved to Vancouver a long time ago can be summed up with the word "climate". I love pond hockey and you will never get that in Vancouver but what you lose in pond hockey you make up for in winter gardening. Mind you we did take quite the chill in November that put a serious skid on my celery operation, which in turn has affected my soup production. If I were a wise Robertson I would have had that tarped and protected... meaning winter greenhouse.

My fall garden took a hit from the stooge city workers that look after the park (the greatest threat to the parks welfare for sure). The aggressive hammerhead with the itchy trigger finger on the weed eater took down all of my peas in a simple act of mind-boggling incompetence... perhaps he just didn't want to work that day and he felt that his job sucked and he was so hard done by that he may as well do a really shitty job as an act of protest. After about 5 calls to the city I finally got them to put some plastic protectors around the base of all of the expensive new trees that were put in the park because those fucking idiots kept ringing all of the bark off of the young trees with lazy and indifferent weed eating... they did kill a few trees BTW.

Anyway lets get back to the garden and away from the apathetic city parks crew.

I still hadn't planted that "Bold point garlic" so i needed to get it in the ground and I was more than ready to call the Robertson strawberry patch a complete failure. Recognizing a failure is a success of course when it comes to gardening... climates and plants and soil and concentrations of pests are all variables with every crop so your role as a gardener is to take stock of the particulars of your plot of land and act accordingly with respect to maximum yield to your desired crops. Perhaps i mentioned before that last spring i lugged my neighbours old cement laundry sinks over to the garden and counter sunk them into the plot of land at incredible effort to myself in the bizarre hope that they would serve as a proper strawberry planter. I don't even understand me some days... like when i was a kid in the principals office and Mr. Gough the principal looked at me enraged... his lower lip quivering and the question was usually "what were you thinking" and the answer was usually something along the lines "it seemed like a good idea at the time but in retrospect i can't make any sense of my actions either". Dumbfounded would be the word i would use to describe his facial expression after that... the good news is now that I'm older usually when i do something bizarre I just harm myself (some people do suffer collateral damage i guess it might be fair to mention).

So Laundry tubs as strawberry planters in a garden in Vancouver... Well it didn't work... my take:

Bad genetic variety of strawberries, slugs, poor drainage, strawberries spread over the planter immediately anyway... very low yield of odd shaped half eaten berries.

Things i did wrong:

Saw the extremely heavy laundry tubs out by the curb and thought "hey i have a good idea", lost my mind an put too much mushroom manure in the tubs, was overconfident about the tubs ability to drain itself.

So on Christmas i dug all the soil (or manure for that matter) out of the tubs, got rid of the strawberry plants, took a 16lb sledge hammer and smashed out the bottom of the damn tubs (or at least broke it up), put some more natural sandy soil in the tubs and planted the "Bold Point Garlic" in the boundary that was defined by the laundry tub. Then I nailed some other garlic in the ground around the tub that was not of the bold point variety so i can keep them separate.

For the record, in a perfect world one should plant garlic in the fall, but lats face it the world is far from prefect and word from the Garlic guru down the street is that you can pretty much do anything to garlic and it will carry on.

I also did a little clean up. A little garbage pick up around the park is good for the soul. remove all the dead pea stocks from the fence and remove my removable fence extensions for taller pea growth. looks cleaner, neater sharper and more ready for the coming season.

Things to do:

Order quality seeds, go dig up some of those hops roots and get some in the new "roundabout" on our street and in the back alleys. Keep an ear to the ground and a thumb on the pulse of the neighbourhood. Engage various people about gardening to 1) put the itch in others, and 2) pick up some hot tips.

Also i finally finished the studio recording of that song i wrote about that time i ripped my leg open on a rusty metal bar that i put in the garden to base a fence off of because my garden neighbours at the time would just walk all over my plants and i foolishly thought a fence or boarder would offer protection but of course it backfired and i nearly killed myself. Greet the world with love no matter what face it shows you is the lesson.


I call the song Rage hero episode #37 because i figured it was about the 37th time in my life that i have seriously injured myself at the hands of some inane scheme i devised to "make life easier"... Genny Trigo sang it and killed it.

happy new year gardeners.