the montra

Everybody who can should have a garden... it puts one in touch with the natural living world. Gardening is not a competition, but if it can be turned into one to help get a greater yield, then do it.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

China Creek park south needs a new caretaker... no question

OK lets get this bad boy over with... i think we can let the photographs tell the story:

So how does one accidentally trim a pea plant at waist height? Can one be so incompetent? Or is the word malicious? Seeing that i have placed rocks around the base of the fence and just the day before trimmed the grass around the edge so the city workers wouldn't have to. (photo from early in the spring) one might think that what happened is unthinkable?
Clearly one needs to maul all the peas as a matter of principle, because of course you can't have peas on a fence in the community garden... that's fucking blasphemous Fuck that guy and his peas... rules say what goes on in the garden stays in the garden... clearly we are too busy doing a real good job keeping the park beautiful.

One of our other instructions is that if you see a piece of garbage like a VHS tape then hit it with the riding mower and spread the shit all over the place and then just fuck off and leave it.

Also when you put thousands of dollars of new trees into a park the best thing you can do is ring the bark off every one of them a few weeks after they are planted right before a heat wave.
lets face it, as a city worker your life sucks and you need to let people know that your life sucks and you can do that by doing the shittiest job possible so that the people of the neighbourhood go to their park and just shake their fucking heads at what an incredible disgrace this thing is. It's not lost on us, your indifference is not lost on me... BTW i put myself through University in part by doing landscaping for a private company.. one of the things we did when we finished a job was to look back and see it and if anything looked wrong we fixed it. Clearly the crew that takes care of china creek south park couldn't care less about the work they do.


As for gardening wisdom, I have this:

Shit hole year for tomatoes... i believe i swore by greenhouses and this cold rainy year brought on the blight in the biggest way. You have to cut that blight away...better to have a blight less twig than a bushy blight ridden plant.

Just harvested a king hell crop of garlic that i planted last fall... cut the tops so they don't seed and put the energy into bulbs.

Beets good, broccoli good, beans good... peas were great until murdered by self serving goateed beer drinking fools with their whole life in front of them like a thundercloud.

Either i planted too much celery or i didn't make enough soups... as a busy father of 3 young kids I'll cut myself some slack. i am now the poet laureate of china creek south park and i spent the day picking up garbage in the park so the idiot lawn cutting crew doesn't shred it putting more plastic Slurpee cups into the fold.

Why do we have lawns and disposable plastic cups?

seriously

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